Study: Too Much Praise Could Be Bad For Your Child
Season 12 of ‘American Idol’ is off and running and while the judges and contestants may change, one thing stays the same: some of the ‘Idol’ hopefuls are delusional enough to think they have the talent to make it because no one has ever had the guts to tell them they can’t sing.
It’s that type of ‘over the top’ praise that one noted Psychologist claims might do more harm than good. According to Stephen Grosz, author of The Examined Life:
Saying something to your child like, “you’re so clever” might cause them to be unhappy because they feel they cannot meet the false expectation.
How can you pat your kids on the back and keep it real at the same time? Hand out compliments less often and in a way that acknowledges effort more than achievement.
Here’s what the study involved:
Psychologists from Columbia University asked about 130 students between ages ten and 11 to solve a number of math problems.
Afterwards, some kids were told they did very well and were very clever, while others were told they did very well and that they must’ve tried really hard.
Both groups of children were then given more difficult problems to solve, and researcher found that children who were told they were clever did not do as well as the others.
The bottom line: if it’s solving math problems or singing, focus more on the effort, not the end result.