If the Vikings are going to make the NFL playoffs they need to beat the Packers this Sunday in the Metrodome.  They are 3 1/2 point underdogs.  The game is scheduled for a 3:25 start after the league decided to change the start time from a 12 noon kickoff.  This way Minnesotans & Cheese Heads have 3 more hours of good hard tailgating before the game starts.  Now keep in mind this is a big divisional rivalry.  And what makes a really high pressured game even more family friendly and fun?  Why it's 3 more hours of good hard drinking time for sworn foes to get plowed!  Have you noticed that it's no longer any fun to take your wife and kids, or anybodies kids, to an NFL game?  Fans are now just mean.  We went to a Vikings game last year.  There were 2 sloppy drunk loud mouthed idiots 2 rows in front of us.  They were standing up, wobbling all over, screaming stupid crap at the tops of there dim witted lungs and spilling $10 beers all over everyone.  It got so bad that finally my wife had to say something.  (Now I could have said something, but no one listens to me.)  My wife is normally very frugal with her word economy.  But in this situation she made a sizable withdrawal from her First National word bank.  It was an impressive display of communicative skills that made many folks in our section very appreciative, as these slack jawed boozehounds droned on.  Finely, it was obvious that "Sloppy McDrunk Drunk" and his buddy "Boozy McPee Pants" needed a stadium seat intervention.  My lovely wife, as only she can, stood up.  She looked down on them 2 rows below us.  And stared right into their blood-shot crossed-eyes and said with the utmost authority,  and I quote:  "HEY YOU DRUNKEN FAT ASSES!  SIT THE HELL DOWN AND SHUT UP"!  Well, they looked at her.  They looked at everyone else looking at her.  They looked and each other.  And they went and did it.  They sat down and commenced to shutting up.  I have often envied my wife's ability to access a given situation and then prescribe the exact needed antidote.

It's week 17 of the NFL season.  It's do or die for the Purple and Gold.  I sure wish my wife could deliver the pregame pep talk to the team.  I know she'd have just the right words!